Asking for help
It is essential, however, to admit you are only human and cannot deal with everything on your own. Making this admission is courageous.
Many of us wrongly believe that stress is just part of the job, and we should tough it out if we want to succeed. But this confuses work pressures (such as when we are heading into trial or a hearing) with ongoing, unrelenting stress. Inevitably the latter will take both a physical and mental toll on us.
It may be a good idea to break down this process in your mind:
- Admitting there is a problem and that ignoring it will only make it worse;
- Admitting you need some help in dealing with it;
- Finding the right person to talk to;
- Deciding what to say;
- Deciding on an action plan to make things better.
WHERE TO FIND HELP
- Need to talk? Free call or text 1737 any time for support from a trained counsellor
- Lifeline 0800 543 354 or 09 522 2999 or free text 4357 (HELP)
- Suicide Prevention Helpline 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOK0)
- Youthline 0800 376 633 or free text 234
- Samaritans 0800 726 666.
New Zealand Law Society
The New Zealand Law Society has introduced a nine-month trial of a free and confidential professional counselling service. It is available to anyone in a legal workplace – lawyers and non-lawyers.
The scheme is provided through Vitae and gives access to three free, confidential sessions with an appropriate counselling professional of your choice. The first two sessions are on a self-referral basis. Vitae can recommend, on an anonymous basis, that the Law Society funds a third session if needed. This recommendation is made without revealing individual or identifying information to the Law Society.
The Law Society does NOT have access to your details. Vitae does not at any stage pass on identifying details to the Law Society. It is completely confidential.
To access the service:
- Free call 0508 664 981
- Fill out the online referral form at www.vitae.co.nz
- Download the Vitae NZ app from the App Store or Google Play
For further details, visit the NZLS's website.
MAS (Medical Assurance Society)
In a separate scheme, the NZBA has partnered with MAS to provide benefits for members. One of these benefits is access to three free EAP (independent counselling) sessions for MAS Members to help manage stress, burnout or any other mental health issue you may experience. Although this service is currently only available to MAS Members, a discounted service for non-MAS members will be available as part of the partnership with NZBA. We will update you when we can.
Choosing who to speak to
When picking who to confide in, your first requirement should be that they are someone you can trust. That person should also be someone who can listen. They can be someone you know, such as a friend or colleague. Speaking to a fellow professional can be very useful as they will have a greater awareness of work-related problems. On the other hand, they are often subject to misconceptions of having to tough it out that get so many of us into trouble in the first place.
Another issue is that you may be concerned that your colleague or friend as dealing with enough and you don't want to be a burden to them. This often short changes your colleague or friend who would be horrified to learn that you don't feel you can approach them. It is also important to remember - at some time in the future (or the past), they may have a problem that they need to seek help with. By opening up with them now, you could be encouraging them to seek advice at an early stage.
You may like to speak to a member of our Bar Care Panel. They are experienced, legal practitioners who understand the pressures and stresses of legal work and who have volunteered to be available to members as the first point of contact. They are willing to give their time and experience to help. They are committed to the wellbeing of those in the profession.
However, depending on the nature of the problem, you may decide to go to a doctor, counsellor or therapist as a starting point. You will have strong safeguards against disclosure of your health information under the Health Information Privacy Code, industry standards and evidential rules. Be sure that you choose a professional who is subject to these requirements.
How to start the conversation
Asking for help sounds simple, but it is often difficult to do in practice. Sometimes it can be hard to find the right starting point. If you are dealing with a colleague, try a simple approach such as "Can you spare me half an hour? I have a confidential problem that I need some help with" or "Do you have time to give me some confidential advice about a problem I have?".